This is a quote I have been looking at a lot lately. If you would have asked me a year ago where I thought I would be right now, I would have told you finishing my first year of College. Passing all my courses, working hard and doing great. But then the unexpected happened. I failed my Nursing course by 4%… 4% thats it. Yes, I was so so close to passing but I did not. And that hit me hard, because it was the unexpected. I expected myself to pass, everyone around me expected me to pass. But sometimes that doesn’t happen, sometimes we fall short!
I had this vision in my head of how college and my life was going to be. I was going to start college, finish in 2 years, get married and finish my BSN and live happily ever after. My plan, my vision was crushed when I failed this semester. This is not how I thought it would go, and that is not how I thought I would do academically…. But its okay. It is more than okay, because God has a plan. All along God has had a Plan and he is the only one who knows how my Journey truly looks. So I can have “visions” of what I want my life to look like, but God is in charge. God is the one I need to trust.
When I first found out I failed. Not only was I disappointed in myself but my parents were too. Being told the words “you didn’t try hard enough” or “we didn’t see you putting the work in.” They hit me hard. I worked between 28-36 hours a week while being a full time student. I paid my car, I spent hours studying… None of it mattered because I failed…I tried my best to please everyone around me.. And that’s where I went wrong. All my life I have been a people pleaser, but when does it come time that I think about myself. That I think about what I want to do with my life ? When I realize that I can not please everyone in my life?
These past few months have been nothing but easy, and Ive learned to trust God in ways I never have before. Praying constantly asking God “where next” “where next, what do you have in store for me.” My parents don’t understand my path or why I now want to do LPN school and then bridge to RN, but that’s okay. Because I have been praying and I know where God wants me and what he wants me to be doing. And though the path may not be easy, and I may lose people along the way. I will never lose God, I will never lose God. Life is full of unexpected twists and turns, life is full of hard times, and mistakes and times of failure. But how we get back up, how we come back that’s what matters most.
There will always be more to life than what we know. There will always be an unexpected turn, but it is how we handle it and how we continue to live after it, that really plays a role in our lives. “Life is short and unexpected. So live for the moment and be thankful for every breath.” So sure, I may not be where my parents wanted me to be academically, I may have failed. But life is short and unexpected. So I can sit here and cry and be upset, or I can pray and trust God and continue on. I choose to get back up and continue on, because though life will be full of more unexpected turns, I continue to trust God and follow him.
Jesus Lover 